Surviving the holidays with your ex

- Holidays can be stressful for everyone, but for families who are blended, or where moms and dads are separating, this next month can be challenging.

Attorney Sabrina Cronin from the Cronin Law Firm joined us on The Nine with tips on how to keep the peace. For more information on Cronin Law Firm, visit

1. Stay Amicable

  • Put aside your feelings for the betterment of the children
  • This is extremely difficult especially if one spouse feels "wronged"
  • You have to be a good actor and be very strong
  • Don't show animosity for the other parent in front of the children
  • Take the high road
  • Don't try to be right
  • Just try to do what's right

2. Share the Holidays as Much as Possible

  • If you don't have a parenting time schedule worked out yet, try to be as fair a possible
  • Realize the children need both parents
  • Normalcy and consistency are very important to the children
  • Remember you are divorcing each other, not the children
  • Don't put the children in the middle or disparage the other parent in front of the children
  • If the children are used to seeing relatives over the Holidays, they should still be able to see them
  • Extended families are crucial for the children to help maintain consistency and the feeling of being loved and accepted

3. Be Mature

  • Remember, you have to instill solid values for your children, and they learn by watching your actions
  • Maintain boundaries, but be fair
  • If your children are old enough, ask them what they want and how they want to spend the Holidays
  • Spend quality time with them
  • Listen to them
  • Respect your soon to be ex and your children
  • Remember your children did not chose this relationship, you did

4. Be Merciful

  • Forgiveness goes a long way, no matter how hurt you may be
  • In the end, you have to get on with your life, and it serves you no good to be angry
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