For the first time since walking off the job at the Michigan State House, Todd Courser is talking to the media about his resignation and role in the sex affair that shocked the House of Representatives.
Around 3:00 Friday morning, Courser announced his resignation on the floor of the House. The disgraced lawmaker resigned when it became clear that majority Republicans had secured enough support from Democrats for his expulsion by promising to ask the attorney general and state police to investigate.
Courser, along with his former mistress Cindy Gamrat, were both escorted out of the chamber.
"My actions were my own, they were my own. It caused havoc for so many people but my failures are mine. They're my responsibility and I have to live with that," Courser said.
Just days after his resignation from the State House, former Representative Courser, a Tea Party candidate and devout Christian, admits his affair with Gamrat and his attempt to cover it up also make him a hypocrite.
"It was really, really difficult to tell my wife and my family. Nothing more excruciating than having to explain to your children."
However, Courser says there was scant evidence that he and Gamrat misused taxpayer funds and they should have been censured, not expelled as Gamrat was. Courser chose at the last minute in the early morning hours last Friday to resign.
"I was fully prepared to go through the expulsion all the way to the end but i really felt God tugging on my heart as we went towards those steps," Courser said.
Courser says the Republican leadership was not going to settle for anything but a vote for expulsion.
"The State Police came in and held everybody at their seats and made sure people weren't going to the bathroom. (They) couldn't use the bathroom, the doors were barred," Courser said. "That's really what the leadership put them through to get the votes at the end; making it as uncomfortable as possible."
Courser says he had made enemies in Lansing because of his politics and months ago was contacted by someone threatening to expose his affair if he didn't resign. That's when he says he came up with the bizarre cover up scheme: a graphic email that would allege an affair with a male prostitute and called Courser a bi-sexual, porn-addicted, sex deviant and a gun toting Bible thumping freak.
"If there was some way to be able to expose that level of corruption and if it was connected to state government or not to stat government, that was important to do so I continued forward," Courser said.
He also said he was trying to buy time and expose the person he says was blackmailing him. Ultimately, Courser says he takes full responsibility for his actions, for the affair and for the pain he's caused his family, Gamrat's family, and his constituents. He says the affair is over and he and his wife are in counseling while he's getting back to work.
"You can't go back you can only go forward and you have to take good steps going forward," Courser said.
Michigan State Police are still investigating. Courser said he expected the investigation to reveal who was trying to blackmail him and he'll have more to say when the investigation is complete.